Yea, it's not technically Thursday anymore, you got a freebie yesterday, so piss off.
Everyone these days seems to be feeling helpless and unable to change the world as a whole.
Here is the truth.
You are only helpless because you allow yourself to be.
Change is risk. Risk on the part of those trying to cause the change. Everyone thinks of people like the president and think "Wow, well if I had his power I'd totally change everything."
Truth is, most of us wouldn't. Presidents have power in votes. Those are the number of people who by voting for them submit their will to the president.
The president has the support of these people, but also realizes that nothing he does will agree with everyone, any big changes he makes has to be approved of by the majority or his support will dry up.
Think about how much George W. Bush managed to pull off when his approval rating was high as opposed to when he was extremely unpopular.
He didn't really do anything new in the last couple years in office. He just coasted along on the things he did early in his presidency.
Now for the rest of us, the rules are different, We have no supporters to lose, all we have to risk is ourselves.
Think of the founding fathers, they all had supporters, they were elected colonial officials, they risked support.
Now think of people like MLKJ, the women's vote movement, the slaves who escaped captivity in the underground railroad.
Those were people who risked themselves.
Some paid for it with their lives, but the effects of people who stand up without supporters far outweighs those who stand up with supporters.
If you stand up by yourself, you are saying to the world "I disagree with this so much that I am willing to die for it."
Think of the man who stood up to the tank in China.
Think of Rosa Parks.
(granted, Rosa risked arrest, not death)
So you can't really complain too much about the world as a whole, since clearly none of us disprove anything enough stand up against it.
We all have our triggers, and the government as a whole knows where these triggers are.
They know that if the middle class starts feeling like slave labor, they will revolt.
They know that if the stop us from speaking out, we will do it anyways just to spite them.
They know that if enough of the population dips into the poverty level, we will revolt.
They know that if we revolt, it will cost them excessive amounts of money to stop us and to repair whatever damage we cause. And no matter what, they will still seem like the bad guys.
Think back to the Rodney King Riots. We all remember some shocking footage from those days, looters, rioters, destruction of property, assault on innocent bystanders.
But no-one will say that the rioters were not justified in their anger.
The powers that be watch us, and do their best to fuck us as hard as they can, but restrain themselves from fucking us so hard that we bite their dick off.
Friday, January 30, 2009
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Surprise update.
You'll still get the weekly post tomorrow, but this is a topic that demanded immediate attention.
People who think they are funny, who actually aren't.
I had the misfortune of meeting two yesterday. A professor who thought he was being clever by making as many bad puns as possible, and a student who spent the entire class period spitting game at every girl within earshot, and making as many bad jokes as possible.
Addressing #1
Puns are the lowest quality of humor. They immediately say to the world "Hi! Im not clever enough to actually create a joke from nothing, so instead Im going to take what you just said and make a bad play on words about it." They are funny, ONCE. If you make one pun over the course of a day, excuse yourself for the bad joke, tell it anyway, and move on. Everyone will remeber you as someone with a sense of humor, granted, not a good sense of humor, but a sense of humor atleast. If the only humor you can get out is puns, you need to stop trying to be funny. Puns are "groaner" jokes. Everyone gets it, but only the person telling the joke thinks it's funny. Move on with your life. You aren't funny, get over it, please stop making the rest of the world suffer.
#2
Is a slightly different topic, bad jokes remain the same, but moreso I am addressing the bad character displayed by trying to be the center of attention. People as a whole are fairly democratic in how they like to divide their attention, they inherintly feel that everyone deserves their own time in the limelight, and as long as you don't interrupt their own time, everything is kosher.
People like this young man feel that they should always be in the limelight, and to hell with everyone else.
*rolls up newspaper*
No!
*hits with newspaper*
This is a bad quality to have and the only people it attracts are people who want attention, the same attention that you want from them, so what ends up happening is you get two people who feel like they are in the spotlight, and never actually pay attention to anyone else, or eachother.
More than that, it's highly irritating to everyone else who actually listens to what other people say. We pay attention, we notice every thing that you do wrong, because you won't give up the spotlight. So we all spot each of your bad qualities rather quickly and soon have no interest in listening to you anymore. Sucks to be you.
Life sucks, wear a hat.
In closing, being funny is not about being able to recite a joke, or make a play on words, or cut down on other people. It's about paying attention to other people and knowing what will make them laugh. Good comedians watch their audience, they pay attention early on to what jokes elicit what noises from the audience. If a joke elicits boos, they clearly avoid jokes like that, if a joke elicits groans, maybe risk one more, but don't press your luck. The art of making other people laugh is not about making yourself feel important, it's about making everyone else feel better than they were feeling before.
People who think they are funny, who actually aren't.
I had the misfortune of meeting two yesterday. A professor who thought he was being clever by making as many bad puns as possible, and a student who spent the entire class period spitting game at every girl within earshot, and making as many bad jokes as possible.
Addressing #1
Puns are the lowest quality of humor. They immediately say to the world "Hi! Im not clever enough to actually create a joke from nothing, so instead Im going to take what you just said and make a bad play on words about it." They are funny, ONCE. If you make one pun over the course of a day, excuse yourself for the bad joke, tell it anyway, and move on. Everyone will remeber you as someone with a sense of humor, granted, not a good sense of humor, but a sense of humor atleast. If the only humor you can get out is puns, you need to stop trying to be funny. Puns are "groaner" jokes. Everyone gets it, but only the person telling the joke thinks it's funny. Move on with your life. You aren't funny, get over it, please stop making the rest of the world suffer.
#2
Is a slightly different topic, bad jokes remain the same, but moreso I am addressing the bad character displayed by trying to be the center of attention. People as a whole are fairly democratic in how they like to divide their attention, they inherintly feel that everyone deserves their own time in the limelight, and as long as you don't interrupt their own time, everything is kosher.
People like this young man feel that they should always be in the limelight, and to hell with everyone else.
*rolls up newspaper*
No!
*hits with newspaper*
This is a bad quality to have and the only people it attracts are people who want attention, the same attention that you want from them, so what ends up happening is you get two people who feel like they are in the spotlight, and never actually pay attention to anyone else, or eachother.
More than that, it's highly irritating to everyone else who actually listens to what other people say. We pay attention, we notice every thing that you do wrong, because you won't give up the spotlight. So we all spot each of your bad qualities rather quickly and soon have no interest in listening to you anymore. Sucks to be you.
Life sucks, wear a hat.
In closing, being funny is not about being able to recite a joke, or make a play on words, or cut down on other people. It's about paying attention to other people and knowing what will make them laugh. Good comedians watch their audience, they pay attention early on to what jokes elicit what noises from the audience. If a joke elicits boos, they clearly avoid jokes like that, if a joke elicits groans, maybe risk one more, but don't press your luck. The art of making other people laugh is not about making yourself feel important, it's about making everyone else feel better than they were feeling before.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
My E-penis is a bigger graphic than yours.
Hello readers, Thursday again, time to discuss another exciting example of human retardation.
The E-Penis. Similar to the Car-Penis or the Yacht-penis, this is the Internet of braggery.
In every social circle there will be a number of people, usually men, who feel insecure about the size of their E-penis and feel they need to brag about it and/or put down others to build themselves up.
In video games it comes about usually in voice chat where players discuss how heavily they "Pwned some nubs" etc.
This practice is beyond stupid.
Not only does it signify the same bullying and mockery that most of us supposedly grew out of in puberty, it also is made more pathetic by the fact that none of the qualities or skills being bragged about are really worth a damn.
Hopping on World of Warcraft and saying "My epic geared warlock could totally own your poorly geared rogue, assuming I got the drop on you and the wind was blowing from the west" is like saying I could jump 9 feet into the air assuming I had a trampoline. Anyone could do it in the same circumstances. PVP in any video game isn't really about skill, it's about a number of specific qualities that person being mocked has no control over.:
1. Their memory of the battlezone in question. If this is their first time and their opponent spends 7 hours a day in that zone, they will lose.
2. Computer/console quality and latency. This is the worst case of superiority because they beat other people due to computer lag, not skill or even gear.
3. Gear. If your gear is better than your opponent, that doesn't make you more skilled, that proves that you have less of a life and more time to devote to farming gear.
Over all, none of these qualities prove you are any more skilled than anyone else. Even Being especially good at Raid content does not prove you are any better than anyone else. It means you follow instructions well, follow the strategy for the bosses, and follow your ability rotation.
The only example of real skill I've seen in video games is the ability to pull victory from the jaws of defeat. Winning a PVP battle when your opponent is better geared than you, winning pvp when you are heavily out-numbered, etc.
Even in Raids, Preventing what would otherwise be safely assumed a wipe, that takes skill, and a hefty amount of luck. These moments should be celebrated and those responsible for the save should be congratulated.
But that is video games, and Video games are in nature a competition.
What is truly pathetic is when people demand to show off their E-penis in completly invalid or unrelated moments.
People who try to prove how smart they are by looking up something on wikipedia and proving somebody on youtube wrong.
You aren't smarter than them, you merely know how to operate a search engine.
The major problem I have with this practice is the pointless nature of it. The only people who actually care about the size of your E-penis are the people who want to show that it's smaller than theirs. None of the rest of us give a shit.
I want their to be a specific channel in all video games and post/response sites for braggery. These people can be free to spam "I pwned u Newb" as much as they want, but we don't have to see it unless we join the channel. Then impose a silence feature for anyone caught spamming normal communication channels with their bragging/mocking.
Hell, If we could figure a way to do it, I'd say we should mount shock collars on anyone caught doing this.
But I doubt people would agree to it.
Savor your victories, mourn your defeats, but don't get the rest of us involved in it if we don't want to be.
The E-Penis. Similar to the Car-Penis or the Yacht-penis, this is the Internet of braggery.
In every social circle there will be a number of people, usually men, who feel insecure about the size of their E-penis and feel they need to brag about it and/or put down others to build themselves up.
In video games it comes about usually in voice chat where players discuss how heavily they "Pwned some nubs" etc.
This practice is beyond stupid.
Not only does it signify the same bullying and mockery that most of us supposedly grew out of in puberty, it also is made more pathetic by the fact that none of the qualities or skills being bragged about are really worth a damn.
Hopping on World of Warcraft and saying "My epic geared warlock could totally own your poorly geared rogue, assuming I got the drop on you and the wind was blowing from the west" is like saying I could jump 9 feet into the air assuming I had a trampoline. Anyone could do it in the same circumstances. PVP in any video game isn't really about skill, it's about a number of specific qualities that person being mocked has no control over.:
1. Their memory of the battlezone in question. If this is their first time and their opponent spends 7 hours a day in that zone, they will lose.
2. Computer/console quality and latency. This is the worst case of superiority because they beat other people due to computer lag, not skill or even gear.
3. Gear. If your gear is better than your opponent, that doesn't make you more skilled, that proves that you have less of a life and more time to devote to farming gear.
Over all, none of these qualities prove you are any more skilled than anyone else. Even Being especially good at Raid content does not prove you are any better than anyone else. It means you follow instructions well, follow the strategy for the bosses, and follow your ability rotation.
The only example of real skill I've seen in video games is the ability to pull victory from the jaws of defeat. Winning a PVP battle when your opponent is better geared than you, winning pvp when you are heavily out-numbered, etc.
Even in Raids, Preventing what would otherwise be safely assumed a wipe, that takes skill, and a hefty amount of luck. These moments should be celebrated and those responsible for the save should be congratulated.
But that is video games, and Video games are in nature a competition.
What is truly pathetic is when people demand to show off their E-penis in completly invalid or unrelated moments.
People who try to prove how smart they are by looking up something on wikipedia and proving somebody on youtube wrong.
You aren't smarter than them, you merely know how to operate a search engine.
The major problem I have with this practice is the pointless nature of it. The only people who actually care about the size of your E-penis are the people who want to show that it's smaller than theirs. None of the rest of us give a shit.
I want their to be a specific channel in all video games and post/response sites for braggery. These people can be free to spam "I pwned u Newb" as much as they want, but we don't have to see it unless we join the channel. Then impose a silence feature for anyone caught spamming normal communication channels with their bragging/mocking.
Hell, If we could figure a way to do it, I'd say we should mount shock collars on anyone caught doing this.
But I doubt people would agree to it.
Savor your victories, mourn your defeats, but don't get the rest of us involved in it if we don't want to be.
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Puritans bred themselve out of existence.
It's Thursday. Which means it's time for another post.
Im gonna skip right past all the festering rat shit and go to the main course.
Frigging Twilight and the new Abstinence movement.
Most of you have heard of Twilight. It's a piece of crap book that got turned into a piece of crap movie. It tells the story of a human girl who falls in love with a vampire. Only this vampire has no fangs. He's a castrated useless puritan douchebag who refuses his new mortal girlfriend sex, and instead stalks her and watches her sleep at night. Oh, and unlike other vampires who burst into flames in sunlight, this one sparkles.
Give me a frigging break.
Vampires are a myth about sexuality. It's the age-old question of "what would you do if you could live forever?"
I don't know about all of you, but refusing sex is not on my list of things to do with immortality.
Vampires are the creatures of the night, inherently sinful and proud of it. They drink blood for fuck's sake. It is an intimate experience, and for some reason this vapid mormon douchebag author feels appropriate to change the entire point and purpose of vampires, yet still call them vampires.
Call them "Puritan douchebag Fairies". Yea, that fits.
But this book/movie franchise wouldn't have a market if it wasn't for the frigging abstinence monkeys.
I read and hear about all these religious groups forming support groups for virgins to keep them pure and save themselves for marriage.
Hate to break it to you guys, but here are the statistics:
Kids who practice "abstinence" delay their sexual awakening, by about 6 months. They then are much more likely to practice unsafe sex.
Also, christian couples have a higher divorce rate than non-christians, for the same reason.
Marriage is out-dated, as is Abstinence. Screw whoever you want, just don't be retarded about it. And don't pine for a "bad-boy" while pretending to be a "good-girl". It's frigging pathetic.
Im gonna skip right past all the festering rat shit and go to the main course.
Frigging Twilight and the new Abstinence movement.
Most of you have heard of Twilight. It's a piece of crap book that got turned into a piece of crap movie. It tells the story of a human girl who falls in love with a vampire. Only this vampire has no fangs. He's a castrated useless puritan douchebag who refuses his new mortal girlfriend sex, and instead stalks her and watches her sleep at night. Oh, and unlike other vampires who burst into flames in sunlight, this one sparkles.
Give me a frigging break.
Vampires are a myth about sexuality. It's the age-old question of "what would you do if you could live forever?"
I don't know about all of you, but refusing sex is not on my list of things to do with immortality.
Vampires are the creatures of the night, inherently sinful and proud of it. They drink blood for fuck's sake. It is an intimate experience, and for some reason this vapid mormon douchebag author feels appropriate to change the entire point and purpose of vampires, yet still call them vampires.
Call them "Puritan douchebag Fairies". Yea, that fits.
But this book/movie franchise wouldn't have a market if it wasn't for the frigging abstinence monkeys.
I read and hear about all these religious groups forming support groups for virgins to keep them pure and save themselves for marriage.
Hate to break it to you guys, but here are the statistics:
Kids who practice "abstinence" delay their sexual awakening, by about 6 months. They then are much more likely to practice unsafe sex.
Also, christian couples have a higher divorce rate than non-christians, for the same reason.
Marriage is out-dated, as is Abstinence. Screw whoever you want, just don't be retarded about it. And don't pine for a "bad-boy" while pretending to be a "good-girl". It's frigging pathetic.
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Depression is like sticking your head into a loaded cannon.
It's been going around alot lately. Depression. The wonderful state of being where you are miserable, everyone else should be too, and you'll be damned if you're gonna suffer through it by yourself.
This notion is retarded.
Depression is an excuse. It is a reason to say "No, I don't want to do that" without seeming like a dick.
Well Im sorry, you still seem like a dick.
Everyone gets depressed occasionally, it's a fact of life. But people who dwell in depression are one of two things:
1. Convinced that they deserve to feel this bad all the time.
2. Obsessed with the attention it provides.
While #1 is a more clear issue of self-esteem, #2 is a issue of ego. People who feel they deserve to feel like crap have some intense belief that somewhere they did something so horrible that it demands that they never be happy again. I wish those people the best, I hope the come to terms with their actions, but in the long run, they will be fine.
People with the second kind of depression think that as long as they wallow in suffering, people will love and support them. In the short-term this is true, but it also slowly forces everyone away from you. So soon you have to find new friends, have a new horrific event occur to you, and start the process over.
Both situations are pointless. The people who feel they deserve to suffer, generally don't deserve it, the people who want the attention, end up spending all of their time getting more attention.
It's ok to be depressed. It's just not ok to dwell in it for too long. If you spend more than a week depressed about the same issue, it's time to rethink this plan.
The issue is clearly not changing, and feeling depressed obviously is having no noticable effect.
Find a new plan, and move on.
As a former type 1 depression suffer, I can tell you that being depressed did absolutely nothing for me. I felt like crap, but my situation remained the same. Because I wasn't actually doing anything about it. I used to be depressed when I was single, and thusly removed myself from the dating pool because who wants to date the chronically depressed guy?
Honestly, try anything, and I mean anything to cheer yourself up out of the funk. My personal favorite is simply thinking about one of my favorite songs and humming along in my head. No one knows why I am smiling and bobbing my head, but they are sure that in this moment, I am happy.
And I am happy in this moment.
Life isn't about finding eternal happiness.
Life is about putting as many breaks in the misery as possible.
If playing with puppies makes you joyful, go visit a pet shop.
You will feel better for a little while, your problems will still be there when you get back, but atleast you'll be facing them with a more hopeful outlook.
Just don't wallow in your suffering like a fucking pig in mud. It's unattractive and uninteresting, and you'll soon find yourself alone, and covered in mud.
This notion is retarded.
Depression is an excuse. It is a reason to say "No, I don't want to do that" without seeming like a dick.
Well Im sorry, you still seem like a dick.
Everyone gets depressed occasionally, it's a fact of life. But people who dwell in depression are one of two things:
1. Convinced that they deserve to feel this bad all the time.
2. Obsessed with the attention it provides.
While #1 is a more clear issue of self-esteem, #2 is a issue of ego. People who feel they deserve to feel like crap have some intense belief that somewhere they did something so horrible that it demands that they never be happy again. I wish those people the best, I hope the come to terms with their actions, but in the long run, they will be fine.
People with the second kind of depression think that as long as they wallow in suffering, people will love and support them. In the short-term this is true, but it also slowly forces everyone away from you. So soon you have to find new friends, have a new horrific event occur to you, and start the process over.
Both situations are pointless. The people who feel they deserve to suffer, generally don't deserve it, the people who want the attention, end up spending all of their time getting more attention.
It's ok to be depressed. It's just not ok to dwell in it for too long. If you spend more than a week depressed about the same issue, it's time to rethink this plan.
The issue is clearly not changing, and feeling depressed obviously is having no noticable effect.
Find a new plan, and move on.
As a former type 1 depression suffer, I can tell you that being depressed did absolutely nothing for me. I felt like crap, but my situation remained the same. Because I wasn't actually doing anything about it. I used to be depressed when I was single, and thusly removed myself from the dating pool because who wants to date the chronically depressed guy?
Honestly, try anything, and I mean anything to cheer yourself up out of the funk. My personal favorite is simply thinking about one of my favorite songs and humming along in my head. No one knows why I am smiling and bobbing my head, but they are sure that in this moment, I am happy.
And I am happy in this moment.
Life isn't about finding eternal happiness.
Life is about putting as many breaks in the misery as possible.
If playing with puppies makes you joyful, go visit a pet shop.
You will feel better for a little while, your problems will still be there when you get back, but atleast you'll be facing them with a more hopeful outlook.
Just don't wallow in your suffering like a fucking pig in mud. It's unattractive and uninteresting, and you'll soon find yourself alone, and covered in mud.
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