Sexual Identity

Been watching alot of Youtube videos lately, and I came across a major revelation.

Americans tend to have no clue as to their sexual identity.

This is most obvious in how we treat those who are on the far edges of what we would consider "normal" sexuality.

First Example:
Transgendered people.
Americans seem really at a loss for how to react to these people. Much in the same way that we don't know how to react to transvestites. When you take away all of the paranoia and vague religious subtext, you simply have a person who is uncomfortable in their native gender and would prefer to be another gender. For transvestites it's usually less severe, they simply don't feel comfortable in the garb of their native gender and would much prefer to wear the garb of the opposite gender.

Realistically, this shouldn't matter to us as a country. If a little girl feels uncomfortable being a girl and would much prefer to be a boy, then why would we want to stop her?
If a man feels miserable wearing a suit and tie and would much rather wear a slinky dress, why stop them?

No-one is telling the general population that they are required to do this, they just need to tolerate other people doing it.

And this brings us to our first major point, Humans, especially in America, have a major gap between who they are and who they want to be.
Some of the problems are environmental and cannot be changed.

Second Example:
A woman might grow up poor but with the feeling that she would have been much better suited to being royalty or nobility or some such. That's a matter of who your parents are. You have no control over it and it cannot be changed. Just like how there are all of the people who become obsessed with another culture and wish that they were born into that culture. (Weebos obsessed with Japanese culture for example). If you were born a white man from Idaho, we can't exactly change you into a Japanese man from Tokyo. You can try to be as similar to that culture as possible, but you'll never be a native.

Other problems can be changed. If you were born poor and want to be rich you can work your ass off and possibly make it to wealthy before you die.

But the major issue is that America seems to fully endorse and encourage one shift and discourage and often outlaw others.

We endorse the concept that you should be Heterosexual, should seek wealth, should be religious, and should get married and have children.

But the supposed "American Dream" lifestyle is both unrealistic and doesn't account for all of the people who don't want it. Furthermore we have an entire culture of shame for people who reject the American dream.

What's especially sad is that the people who reject all or parts of it don't generally choose to, they were just born with brain chemistry that leads them to behave differently.

Atleast we live in slightly more enlightened times, in the old days people like this would have no option. They would be forced into their native country's lifestyle regardless of how they felt about it.

The problem is that America is still clinging to this flawed idea of "Normal" far after it stopped being relevant. Christianity is no longer the one religion of the "civilized" world. It never really was in the first place. People have a wide array of religious faiths or even complete lack there of.
So trying to force the morality of one religion on the rest of the country is insane, because the majority of the country does not practice that religion.

This takes a step further into insanity when we examine sexuality and gender roles. The gender roles are supposedly equal now, but when you look at the statistics they really aren't. Women still make less money than men, they still have a harder time reaching positions of power and they are still treated like property culturally.
If a man were to cheat on his wife then society would roll their eyes and look the other way. If a wife cheats on her husband it turns into world war 3. The country is still trying to treat everything like an old boys club, they cling onto the idea that men are somehow superior to women, and they continue to encourage that behavior in each following generation.

Part of the reason there is so much opposition to homosexuality, transvestites, & transgenderism is that they blur the lines of gender roles. If a relationship consists of two men then they don't know who is supposed to be the dominant one. If a man marries a woman, but he prefers to dress as a woman, does that make him less dominant as a man? If a man transforms into a woman, is he giving up his dominant male power? and furthermore does a woman turning into a man gain his gender's power?

It doesn't matter.
Gender roles are archaic and stupid.
The fact that America still clings to this idea proves that we are too stuck on the past.

Furthermore, strict gender roles lead to unhappiness. Even in stereotypical American Dream families the gender roles are sometimes reversed. We've all seen families of subservient husbands and domineering wives. This isn't new, but for some reason we accept that even though it is just as opposed to the supposed gender roles as homosexuality or cross-dressing.

I often want to argue with especially obstinate religious folks that if a wife ever disagrees with her husband, then by their own religious laws she is being just as sinful as a homosexual and is supposed to be stoned to death.

This is clearly a insane and outdated idea (not that it ever made sense in the first place). You can't pick and choose which rules to follow. The bible says don't eat lobster and men shouldn't have sex with men? Ok, so are you planning to stop eating lobster any time soon? Also, your wife is supposed to be your slave, and if she comes anywhere near a male person while menstruating she is supposed to be executed.

They often reply that Jesus got rid of those old crazy laws.
To which I reply "So when exactly did he tell you that he hates homosexuals?"

Those that are up on their religious history point out that one of the apostles wrote about the subject.
To which I respond that he wrote that while in a Roman prison. Prisoners tend to have a very harsh opinion of anal rapists.

The argument ends and they don't have an answer for me. They are living a lie. They follow one part of the rules because it lines up with the stuff they were planning on doing anyways, they ignore the parts that condemn the stuff that they want to do, and latch onto the parts that condemn other people, who aren't even a part of their faith.

It would make more sense if the people they were attacking were a part of the same religion, but they aren't.

And here is the part where we feel bad for these people. Because of the faith that they have chosen, they don't get to live the life that would make them happier.
Sexual orientation has been widely examined and the major conclusion is that most people are not totally straight or totally gay. Like most things it's shades of gray.
Most Heterosexuals actually contain some homosexual impulses. A man may not want to have sex with another man, but he does want to kiss another man, or to embrace another man lovingly.

In older cultures this was normal. We didn't look down on men who were more open with their affections, it was part of being a man.
But we have developed such a taboo about homosexuality that even minor innocent acts such as these are scorned because they resemble homosexuality too much.

Thus America has become a country of people with pent-up sexuality or people scorned for their sexuality.

It really needs to stop. It doesn't mean anything. Even in the Bible Jesus kisses another man. How is it ok for god yet not ok for his subjects? "What Would Jesus Do?" if he met a male friend who he cared greatly for? He would hug and kiss that dude.

It's not gay, it's not awkward, it's simple affection, and we need to stop making such a big deal about it.

Furthermore, we need to stop freaking out about what other people do in the bedroom, or how they dress, or what gender role they live in.

It doesn't matter. All that matters is what works for our own lives.

I personally prefer to be an equal partner with my significant other. I don't really want either of us to be dominant of submissive. I don't especially want to dress in women's clothes, but I would like the freedom to use their accents (of style, not voice) without someone assuming that I must be a transvestite or a homosexual.

And even if I was, it's none of their business.

Move on, grow up, and stop worrying about what other people do.

Stick to worrying about what you do.